Murphy's Law is More Important than Any Other in Law School

Is this you?  You're jogging along, feeling darn good about your energy, your ability, the beautiful day, and CRACK!  Where did that boulder come from?  Well, it's me.

I was cruising along in law school, unafraid of the big bad law school professor, feeling like I knew what was going on ....avoiding the boulders of not being prepared for class....  and CRASH.  It still got me.

This morning in the class with definitely the scariest law professor in the school, I was minding my own business, feeling darn good because I half understood what was going on, and I'd already been called on, so I assumed I was safe....  He points to the back of the room..."YOU!  The girl who thinks this is funny!  What do you think?"  I didn't answer.  I had no idea he was pointing at me.  The girl behind me said, "Me?"  "NO!  He bellowed.  YOU!"  At this point I'm getting the idea it might be me.  But wait, I hadn't said a word?  Was I sleeptalking in class?  Possible.  But no, I was wide awake.

"Me?"  I say.  "Yes, YOU.  The one who is busy having a conversation while I'm trying to talk."  What in the world is going on I'm now thinking?  Am I losing it?  So, I stutter out something that makes no sense, he makes fun of me, and life goes on.  Or does it?  Right now I'm hiding in the student union rather than the law school because everywhere I go people bring it up.  I do sit near the back of the room, so the other 80 people in class didn't actually see what was going on.  They assume I was the loud mouth, and I got called on.  And I'm an idiot. Ack. 

Sigh...I know it doesn't matter.  But I'm getting sick of saying, "It wasn't me!"  I guess it's all good practice for becoming a defense attorney?  Practice for becoming a heartless jerk?  Practice for growing an iron shell?  If it can go wrong, it will.  Back to reality.

Law School Day 8 (or) Socrates is My Frenemy

Do you know how law school works?  Have you seen a movie where some poor law student stands and is verbally abused by a professor asking outrageous questions all in the name of the "Socratic Method?"   Well, those movies aren't far from the truth.

I already mentioned that on Day 1, class 1, I was called on, but that was an "easy" question.  Now the real fun begins.  I've been "lucky" so far, and I haven't been called on, but well, as they say, every dog has his day. 

Today I was called on in Property.  Some people get easy questions like: Please give me the facts of the case, or please give me the procedural history.  Trust me, these are usually easy because you "should" have the answers right in front of you in your homework. 

Here was MY first question (this is not a joke):

Professor X:  John owns a watch and loses it on Monday.  On Tuesday, David finds it.  On Wednesday, Susie steals it from David.  She then proceeds to lose it, and on Friday, Terry finds it.  Susie sues Terry for the watch.  Who will win?

I won't bore you with the answer.  Let's just say, after five or ten minutes of policy, rules, arguments, etc., I had the answer.  Well, I had the answer from the start actually, and I was able to answer all of the professor's question.  I thought more in those ten minutes than I did in all of grad. school. What has my life become?

Weeks 1 and 2 of Law school (or) Call Me Old Again and I'll Kick Your Ass

In general, the theme of law school is lack of time.  It doesn't help of course that I'm still teaching four classes.  So, here, I'll be brief.  I do still love it.  People are incredibly competitive, and I seem to be a bit of an outcast with the day students.  Almost all of them are going out, crashing at each other's houses, and generally acting their age.  No one has to go home, cut the grass, teach classes, blah blah blah.  My most memorable moment so far is the girl I made cry.

You read right.  I made her cry.  She is one of those I-need-to-over-compensate-so-everyone-likes-me types.  She kept getting in little jokes about my age.  She would say things like, "Well, I would add you on facebook, but you're too old" etc.  At lunch one day I finally broke down when she said, "Everyone knows I'm just sarcastic and joking all the time."  I said, "You know....  I don't think that's true.  I think you really mean what you say and play it off as a joke." 

She got flustered, hid in the bathroom and cried all afternoon, and sent me a long facebook message of apology.   Let's just say, it didn't make me any friends, but it did make less people want to mess with me!

Days 2 and 3 of Orientation (or) When Law Students Smell Blood

Let me just say this now: it is exactly like they show on t.v. 

I know Shark Week is over, but apparently no one told the law students.  Every time a bleach-blonde Louis Vuitton-carrying stiletto-wearing gum-chewing overachiever raises her hand, I see fins and teeth.  Apparently they have psyched us out so much for law school that there's no reason for the professors to send out the bait.  We tear each other apart!

Yesterday was my first "Torts" class.  The professor walked in and started grilling people.  It was apparent pretty quickly that no one was going to wait to get called on.  They practically swam out of their seats to get at him!

Today was my first "Legal Research and Writing" course.  At 9 a.m. we started.  At 9:01 the first question was thrown out: "Miss R., define the term 'law' for me."  (Miss R. was me...) Hey, at least I answered and didn't drown. 

Things I overheard today from other law students:
* "Can you believe that guy is in law school.  I mean, he's like THIRTY!"
*  "She looks like Maggie Gyllenhaal.  I wonder if she knows that!"  (This was whispered about me.  I think they're all afraid of me because they've all figured out I have a PhD.)
*  "Like, I have had to turn down three dates already today from guys because I am a law student now."
* "My Mom/Dad/Aunt/Uncle/Brother/Dog is a lawyer, so I will be okay."  Keep telling yourself that one buddy :)

Here's the crazy thing.  I love it!  I love it in a way I never once felt during my MFA or PhD.  I like the reading.  I like getting called on.  I like what we're learning.  I'm just going to lay low for now, circle the school, and wait for the perfect moment.  I always did like seafood.

Orientation Day 1 (or) If Only I Could Be a Cougar

Do I hang out with the obnoxious twenty-somethings who make fun of the professors and bet on who will drop out first?  Or do I hang out with the terrified 30 and 40 somethings who seem either afraid of their own shadow or positive they are law student superstars?  It might seem like an insignificant question, but it's my question of the day.

I talked to a few of the older students.  They're all self-concious, talking about LSAT scores, worried about rent and traffic, etc.  And then there's the cute boy (who's only 23) who I can talk to about sports and bars or the marathon.  And of course, it helped my ego that he had no idea I was THIRTY! :)  I think I'll stick with the boys.

Beyond the "who to hang out with" question, the main priorities seem to be:
-scaring the heck out of us
-piling on the work
-pampering us with food and gifts
-confusing the heck out of us

So far, so good.  Stay tuned!

I Can Do This

I have ridden a wild mustang, gone cliff diving in Jamaica, driven a race car at 200 miles an hour, moved to Florida when I was 21, and run 26 miles.  Certainly, I should be able to survive the first day of law school, right?

Let me tell you about the awful beginning I've had so far.  Actually, let me not tell you about it.  Let's just say I skipped the first two "optional" events.  Tomorrow, it begins.  I mean, it really really begins.  I cannot skip it.  Do not pass go.  Do not collect student loans. 

It doesn't matter that I've done this a million times before.  It doesn't matter that the University of Florida was much bigger and more terrifying.  I can do this.

Wish me luck.  Here goes nothing :)

Short List

Okay, these events make my short list for the last two weeks or so:
1.  Spent birthday at home crying into my homemade margarita
2.  Spent day before my birthday arguing with ex that won't go away
3.  Spent day after birthday eating gnocchi and ice cream cake :)
4.  Had someone pay me 400 dollars to take her horse (It was a horse I was training anyway, but uhm, okay)
5.  Did not go to first law school event (baseball game).  I am a giant chicken.
6.  Made red raspberry freezer jam for the first time.
7.  Got stood up twice in the last week from the same friend.  Ack!
8.  Heard from another ex on my birthday who I was hoping had crawled under a rock and died (Why do all the freaks come out on August 7th?)
9.  Did I mention I went to Florida? (will post pictures)
10.  Get to see the new hockey arena on Sunday!!!!
11.  Less than 48 hours to law school and I'm about to lose it!